tomaž is rooting for the other team and other poems


Rachel, Natalie, Josh, and I ate brunch with our friend Michelle at a place called The Gold Standard. Rachel was hoping there would be someone paid to sleep in a window. Instead, our waitress had a mustache. I was called upon to finish whoopee pies. We made a new friend named Aaron, who was sitting at another table reading one of CAConrad's books. There was discussion of putting breakfast in champagne flutes but not for drinking the breakfast, which was probably what you were thinking.

We drove to Washington D.C. I talked with my favorite girl, Carolyn Carrot Cake, on the phone. When we got to D.C, there was a friendly employee at Starbucks who implored us to use many of their bathrooms at once. Natalie called me the J-Lo of UMass. We walked to the White House. I stuck my hand through the gate. We saw Michelle's garden. The police closed the street. We figured it was because Michelle was coming out to garden. Someone was grumbling about the closure, and their wife said "There must be a reason!" in a bright and incredibly frightening tone. There were a lot of egg rolls for sale.

Many kind people from Baltimore came to the Narrow House/Publishing Genius reading, including Justin and Jamie of Narrow House, and The Mighty Joe Young. I met many interesting folks, including Alec Niedenthal and his friend Roz, and Mark C of Big Lucks. Dan, of Barrelhouse, was an awesome host. Ric Royer had a white noise machine, and he was an event. Natalie's stigmata poem went over well. Rachel read a condensed version of "Pee On Water" which was still very epic. Adam Robinson worked the crowd like an elegant sailor, and he also bought me a whiskey. I drew two hockey goalies having a sad fight in the copy of my book that Roz bought.

Josh, Natalie, Rachel, and I drove to Josh's parents house in Reston, VA. They have a sign in their garage that says "I worked hard so I could make a good life for my cat." We watched the Celtics lose to the L.A. Rapists. But I ate many terrific foods, such as goat cheese wrapped in berries and homemade salsa. This morning I ate a tiny scone. We are watching the U.S/Slovenia soccer match. The U.S. coach looks like a cross between a police instructor and a soccer ball. We are off for Richmond! Thank you for reading.

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